Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Is marriage always a happy ever after?

I've been thinking about this. Tell me what you think. . .

This happened a couple of months ago. I was sitting in church and listening to all of the spiritual testimonies that were being said over the pulpit. This one girl got up and started to say how her husband and herself have had the most amazing marriage and how they have never fought and how they love each other sooooo much while snuffeling her way through. As I was digesting this I was thinking, "Wow, my marriage sucks!" I have to be honest... McKay and I sometimes have disagreements, fights, act selfishly, and can be bratty to one another. Maybe this is because both of us are Aries. Here is a love horoscope I found off of MSN.com of two Aries:

Aries & Aries
Two personalities governed by the planet Mars are liable to lock horns frequently in combat. Each clearly stakes out a personal territory, a turf where the Aries individuality is asserted, and it requires the unconditional respect of the other. Harmony can reign only in the presence of a powerful, shared ideal which acts to channel the awesome energy of each and unites their strengths instead of opposing them. Together, they can generate megawatts! The love which binds them is impulsive, fiery, and impatient.
This is pretty dead on for McKay and I!

Back to the testimony meeting. While the girl in my ward was saying this I had a hard time believing it. First I thought that if you don't have any dissagreement then your marriage must be dull!

When my friends ask me for marriage advice I will be honest with them. I will say, "Marriage is the most amazing thing you'll ever experience. But it is also one of the hardest things you'll experience too." In my situation I was 19 1/2 years old, niave, and didn't understand the full meaning of marriage and I didn't know the key ingredients to making one run smooth. The hardest lesson I ever had to learn the first couple months of marriage was that it wasn't all about me it was about us. They say that selfishness is the number one reason why couples divorce. It was also hard to admit it when I was at fault and to sincerely say "I'm sorry." Talk about pride. Maturity was what I needed, and I can honestly say that I can see a big difference in two years.

From what you have read you get an idea how our first year of marriage was no easy walk in the park. I know a lot of friends say how wonderful it is, and I have to agree, but I wonder if they are really telling the truth? I wonder why girls aren't more honest about the reality of marriage instead of the fantasy?

Is it too taboo and honest to say that marriage isn't always a fairytale?

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